3 Human Races I Just Came Up With & What I Don’t Like About Them



  • I would venture to tell you that I was waiting behind one for a machine at the gym, if they were real, and he benched just a lot of weight but with like two reps. And he yelled: “Turn on and tune out!”
  • I fantasied that they’re always asking me to reach up to get an item at Home Depot, where I work.
  • I can feel that they want my Rewards Card.
  • When at Home Depot one day, for work, I imagined that I bent mine knee to interact with one of their little ones and then decided to put the child on a fort-lift and then make the fork-lift do a dance and the parent went nuts on me.



  • I pretended that one was real when I was using the bathroom at Home Depot and I asked him if I could wash his hands for him and I was flatly rejected.
  • They are usually employed for construction, if they existed.
  • Germ city!
  • I one time lost my focus while working at Home Depot because I was pretending to lose a round of Dance Dance Revolution to one of them.



  • One time a “saw” one and my blood pressure shot up by several.
  • The kind of music they like is just the “It Follows” OST.
  • When I was at Home Depot, I wasted an entire day hiding in a washing machine because I imagined that they hate cleaning their clothes and then that’s the last place they’d look.
  • They have no cousin loyalty.

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